By Kenny
We live in a society where tolerance is king. Everyone is allowed to believe what they want to believe and to say otherwise is worse than murder. We are a progressive culture.
Then there’s the church. The church is above culture. The church tries to adapt within culture. Sometimes there is no difference between culture and the church.
The hot topic for the last decade both in culture and in church is homosexuality. A lot of people have a lot to say on this topic. A lot if it is controversial with varying degrees of conservatism and liberality. The church is stuck somewhere in between. This can be an uncomfortable subject. I think especially the younger generation feels conflicted with how homosexuality fits into the church. Many of us know homosexual people, are friends with homosexual people and respect homosexual people. I know some homosexual people who love Jesus and are incredible followers! But the church, and everyone that makes up the church, have to decide where they stand. The church has to decide whether gay people can be leaders of the church or those people should be taught to turn away from their homosexual lifestyle. For total equality or against it, in relation to the church (to be neutral or undecided is essentially to be against). To believe homosexuality is unnatural, or a perversion of God’s creation, is to say a necessary mission field opens up. I don’t really see a realistic middle ground.
Personally, I have an incredibly difficult time to even think about what being missional in a homosexual community would look like, especially if the people of that community were Christians. Honestly, I find Scripture clear on the subject – homosexual relationships are unnatural and they are not how God intended relationships to be. However, on this front, I want to believe that they can accept Christ all the same, receive salvation and pursue a healthy relationship with God. In my youth ministry program I will undoubtedly have students who are homosexual. Statistically, I already have. I cannot think about trying to turn them from this lifestyle without potentially severing my relationship with that student and potentially damaging how they see God and the church. I continually struggle with how I might teach the subject without burning bridges. I will inevitably have to take a stance beyond the stance that God loves everyone. Students will have questions and I will have to answer them according to Scripture.
Personally, I have an incredibly difficult time to even think about what being missional in a homosexual community would look like, especially if the people of that community were Christians. Honestly, I find Scripture clear on the subject – homosexual relationships are unnatural and they are not how God intended relationships to be. However, on this front, I want to believe that they can accept Christ all the same, receive salvation and pursue a healthy relationship with God. In my youth ministry program I will undoubtedly have students who are homosexual. Statistically, I already have. I cannot think about trying to turn them from this lifestyle without potentially severing my relationship with that student and potentially damaging how they see God and the church. I continually struggle with how I might teach the subject without burning bridges. I will inevitably have to take a stance beyond the stance that God loves everyone. Students will have questions and I will have to answer them according to Scripture.
KH
Hey Sean – would love to chat more. Just so you know, I did not write the post. I teach at Whitworth and during Jan-term I have my students post their grapplings (everything this month are from students). A fine young man in the class posted this one. Obviously a freighted topic…kinda the reason I believe he wrote on it. Trying to keep the convo going.
Man, I hope we get to hang out sometime soon! BTW – I mentioned you to the Hirch’s a couple of nights ago and they spoke warmly of you!
Peace!
Rob,
I’ve been thinking, praying, talking and reading about your questions for more than two decades, primarily because of my gay friends who love Jesus and are seeking to serve him faithfully. This is not an issue, nor topic, nor difficult subject: this is people – brothers and sisters in Christ, and those who might become so if the church actually begins to love them the way we have experienced the love of Christ ourselves. I’d love to chat more – give me a shout over on facebook if you’re interested, and maybe we can set up a time to skype!
All,
I like the approach you are taking with this. I am a military chaplain and with last years repeal of “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” this issue has come up on more than one occasion. Here are some things I’ll offer to the conversation that have helped me.
1) As Peter said, we should not elevate homosexuality above anything else we believe to be wrong. We are all born into sin, and each of us have/have had original tendencies to do things opposite of God’s will.
2) After #1, asking the question, “how can a homosexual have a right relationship with God?” Which according to #1, wouldn’t be any different from the rest of us who still wrestle with the things we no longer wish to do.
3) I have heard many conversations concerned more with changing/eliminating the nature or tendencies of the individual than about helping an individual submit their nature/tendencies to Christ.
4) When it comes to answering the question in #2, concerning the statement, “I was born this way,” to keep in mind and share that he who is in Christ is a new creation, and we must submit everything of our former life to Christ.
5) Until Christ returns we will all struggle with sinful tendencies. Having a tendency is not a sin. We sin when we fail to submit that to Christ.
The Church needs to show more love to those struggling with homosexual tendencies and asking the question in #2.
Where the Church must stand however, is when those people ask the Church to submit to their tendencies. Our love for God must trump our desire to make sin comfortable as a demonstration of love for a people who have made sin their identity when Christ offers a new identity to all of us.
Hope this helps you sort through this difficult issue. I don’t have this all figured out, but these have helped me relate more in love to friends, Sailors, Marines, and other folks who wrestle with this area.
Grace and Peace
This is definitely a complex and difficult subject! I agree with you that Scripture seems to be very clear on it as well which makes this even more hard to deal with. You make a good point in that if Christians believe it is unnatural or a sin than it presents a clear mission field that cannot be ignored. Homosexual behavior should not be treated any differently than any other behavior we believe to be wrong. There will never be an easy answer to this so I think Josh is right to say that all we can do is leave the condemnation to God and minister to them the same way we would to anyone else.
Kenny you make a very good point. I know that there are a lot of passionate people in the church who have strong opinions on the subject. I have to be honest, I feel really out of my element talking about such deep issues in a classroom setting. However, when we were exposed to it the other day, I wished we would have had a chance to talk about it as a class. I know that this is not what the class is about but like you said its a hot topic and I struggle with it myself. Any way you look at it though, we are all children of God and if you see homosexuality as something that is not a choice for a lot of people then I think you have to accept that God created them, EVERYTHING about them and that includes there sexual orientation.
This topic weighs heavy on my heart. It seems an unsatisfactory road for people to completely disengaged this topic. Realistically, this is the hot button issue of our day and people who ignore it will become swallowed by it. That being said, the other sad realization is that people who do engage people who are gay or people who accept practicing homosexuals aren’t necessarily approaching it with a whole lot of tact. There probably isn’t any clean answer. Sin is messy. As far as youth are concerned, Kenny, you are right to say that this is an excellent opportunity for a mission field. Kids are struggling everyday with all kinds of identity issues, sexuality being one of them. It isn’t fair for them to struggle alone. I don’t have anything to say except I pray God shows you very concrete ways to love people while speaking truth about this topic. I and a lot of others are invested in real people dealing with this very real problem. May God bless you and guide you.
Hi Kenny,
You bring up a very important subject, and unfortunately is one that could take up a lot of blog space. However, here is a book recommended to me by a good friend on this issue. I have not read it yet, but plan too soon.
“Homosexuality and the Christian: A guide for parents, pastors, and friends” by Mark Yarhouse.
This is such a difficult topic. And I agree that it is very awkward when you are confronted with a question and do not want to turn homosexuals away with your answer.
I think that the best approach in this situation is to not rely on your own understanding but on that of Scripture. It is not our job to condemn these people, rather we should simply present the bible to them and let them wrestle with God about their sexual identity.