July 29, 2008

I just got back from Europe and it  is worse than I imagined. I knew the dollar was getting “beaten down” but not to this degree. The Euro is not only substantially more valuable than the dollar than the last time I was here, but also it seems that the 1 Euro buys less. When I have traveled to Europe in the past I expected the exchange rate to suck for me, but I calculated in my mind that that once I exchanged my weak dollar I could at least think about purchases about the same way I think here. Like if a McDonald’s breakfast (which I consume a ridiculous amount of) for five dollars in the states, after I exchanged I could at least use the same five dollar standard, only with Euro. The double whammy now is the same Mickie D’s meal is like 6 or 7 Euro. I felt like yelling at the person at the counter, “Are you joking me! This is friggin McDonalds! I am contacting the Kroch family!” That translates to about a 9 dollar McDonalds breakfast. Crazy! I am boycotting.

Another troubling exchange rate that I discovered on this trip which has caused a great deal of internal processing is how personal and experiential currencies are exchanged from one organization to another. As I enter this new job with Christian Associates, I have realized that in many ways what I have accomplished in the last 24 years of pastoring, catalyzing and learning does not translate directly over. In fact it seems like it might be a detriment in some ways. It is not like the dollars of my life are worthless, but it is as if much of their value is diminished in the exchange.

 This has been troubling primarily because of some weird internal feeling of entitlement I have. Like, I have earned certain respect, privilege, etc. It is obviously prideful on many levels, but difficult nonetheless. Pride is funny like that. If it were an easy adversary, then I would have been a conquering victor years ago. I have had years of battles. I usually get my ass kicked and find myself
in confession/repentance cycles. I am quicker to recognize it, but the battle is still real.

 I think it was Nouwen who spoke about his transition from academia to L’Arche (a community for the disabled) and having the realization of coming to a community that could care less about what he had done, taught, written and been recognized for up to that point and how that led to an awareness that his life and identity were seriously and disablingly wrapped up in what he did
rather who he was as the beloved of God.

 Lesson to learn (again – dang it): I need to accrue a new cache of currency in my new role. Entitlement must be pushed back, and humility must be in front (…and everyone knows how good I am at humility).